


Made an Extension of Herself

by Heartfulkings



Category: Homestuck, MS Paint Adventures
Genre: Age Difference, Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - High School, Alternate Universe- Humanstuck, Coming of Age, Crime, Dead Dove: Do Not Eat, Emotional/Psychological Abuse, F/F, Femslash, Fluff and Angst, Gore, It’s a slow burn only it just slowly goes downward, Porn With Plot, Power Imbalance, Taxidermy, Teen Pregnancy, Trans Female Terezi Pyrope, Trans Female Vriska Serket, Trans Roxy Lalonde, Unhealthy Relationships, masc roxy/Dirk
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-11-04
Updated: 2021-01-19
Packaged: 2021-03-09 04:41:06
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 5
Words: 7,669
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27378880
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Heartfulkings/pseuds/Heartfulkings
Summary: Kanaya Maryam is a very normal girl, with very normal girl problems. She knows she will be expected to carry out a task, but what she isn't prepared for is how it's thrust upon her as greatness and teenage lust tends to do.
Relationships: Dave Strider/Karkat Vantas, Gamzee Makara/Terezi Pyrope, Kanaya Maryam/Vriska Serket, Rose Lalonde/Kanaya Maryam, Roxy Lalonde/Dirk Strider, Terezi Pyrope/Karkat Vantas, Terezi Pyrope/Vriska Serket
Comments: 4
Kudos: 22





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This is a rosemary fic I plan on writing on a regular schedule- though the exact dates are to be decided. Kudos and comments are much appreciated! ^-^

A young girl stands in the middle of her bedroom. Today is the fourth of December, which happens to be this girl's eighteen birthday. 

###  **Kanaya: Introduce Yourself**

Well, you were just about to introduce yourself, as the opening of such stories dictate. No need to be so bossy. Your name is KANAYA MARYAM, the youngest of your family, the MARYAMS. Your mother has been long dead, so perhaps calling you and your sister a whole family unit is all that accurate. This isn’t even taking into account the fact you have recently estranged yourself from aforementioned sister. You mention this, but the details are a locked level in the plot so far. Perhaps you ought to shelf the EXCEEDINGLY TRAGIC BACKSTORY for later. 

Anyway, as your room may reflect, you have an ASSORTMENT OF HOBBIES. There’s a scuffed up vanity, the white paint long resembling yellow, just effective enough for you to apply GOFFICK makeup everyday for school. The mattress you share with AG is humble enough to forego any sort of bed frame. Who the hell even needs bed frames? Lousy snobs, that’s who. It is far too tacky a look for you. 

By the bed there is a night stand, mostly occupied with a stack of books, as well as a notebook with scrawled notes along the pages. There is a window, of course, with plenty of plants hooked up to best absorb the sun. Inside your drawers are the CHOICEST OF OUTFITS, an appropriate indication of your interest in fashion. 

Most people might assume you plan to make a name in the fashion industry after high school, but truthfully you’ve garnered quite the interest in writing, which may or may not have been an option on your radar after becoming invested in what might be your favorite book series yet. 

###  **Kanaya: Lovingly molest your COMPLACENCY OF THE LEARNED box set.**

...You don’t know about _molesting_ but yes, you do run a fond finger along the boxed set. It was a gift from your sister, expensive enough to warrant a week’s length of surviving off leftovers. So worth it. The book spines and box itself are all done up in gold designs against a rich purple. The letters are calligraphy and the borders are intricate designs of tentacles. The series is infamous for it’s dense plot, the time jumps as well as what must surely be a liberal use of the thesaurus makes the content nigh incomprehensible. Thusly, no one seems to appreciate the hidden depths that reside amongst the stories, not even long time fans. You have often found yourself in the crossfire of a reddit discourse or two. 

It holds emotional significance to you, you won’t shy from the truth. The author herself, a quick witted woman of the name ROSE LALONDE, only serves to further the series’ appeal. You’ve found yourself staying up late to catch up on interviews starring her, transfixed by the way she can manage to make even the most mundane of statements sound scornful. Like she’s above it all, and in a way, she is. Rose Lalonde had started as a teenager who couldn’t even pay for college, only to have her transformative writing published, which led to her imminent success. It’s a rags to riches story you can really use. It could be implied that this is a sign of projection assuming one is well versed on basic writing principles. (Don’t be ridiculous. If you were any less precocious you’d claim to not know the definition of the very word “projection”.) 

Wait!

###  **Kanaya: Check TGs fanfic for today’s update.**

You click on the notification that just sounded off. It appears TG’s slow burn fanfiction based off of The Complacency of the Learned has updated, and you hurry to read it before school. 

_frigglish is caught off guard by sight of da attempted asssss (hehe ass)assin, a long libmed and pal wizard.the wozard si the the most beautiful thing he’s ever perceved in his live.the 2 circled each other, like wild cats or sum shit, teeth bared and beards tied up so when they finally fite those greyed locks don’t get in the way and fall in there mouths like how har dos u know? Lol yea like that exactly. Sox anyway the to sexy wozars and 2 b fair all wesards are automatically sexgy._

_Lmao da homoerotism is of the mothafuckin charts, frigglish thinks,_

_As he pulls his characteristic wan d from nowhere because as the canon dictates shit like thsi musdt never make any fuckin sense and like they get redy to duel._

_In a symbolic lights show, the wands let loose violent blasts,merciless enough to barely doge on both parties. Frigglish tryna move as graceful as he knows th assassin to be, his faithful boots falling himm for the first time, their worn out soles allowing his feet to feel ebery harsh trip, every sharp rocles under him,,,_

Oh dear. It appears the author has written this chapter under the influence, as he is known to do. You will have to confront him again. Nonetheless, TG has a real eye for metaphor, each canon event rebuilt and arranged in a refreshing setting. Every scene reflects the original themes and elaborates on them. 

###  **What are you doing?? You are going to be late!**

Shit! You hurry to gather your knapsack on your way out, taking the apartment stairs. You’ve learned better than to take the elevator, considering it’s lethargic pace. KARKAT VANTAS is already outside waiting for you. 

While you’re quite petite you manage to surpass him in height. His skin is several shades lighter than your oaky color, and topping it all is his black birds nest that barely passes as hair. Today he’s swaddled in the oversized turtleneck and high waisted jeans he prefers above any outfit. His jacket is threadbare. You’ve fruitlessly tried to encourage a better wardrobe for him, though he did concede to the jeans you’ve picked out. 

His overbite of craggily teeth deepens with his scowl. “What the hell took you so long Maryam? If I had to wait another fucking minute my balls would shrivel up and freeze over, leaving me with a fucking migraine and bloodlust over you fucking me over like this! If I have to put up with anymore of my stupid motherfucking friends just dicking around I just won’t bother with you assholes! Come to think of it, why _do_ I even bother? The only contribution my stupid fucking friends have added to my life is another piece of misery left for me to fucking covet, like a disease.” 

“Hello Karkat,” you greet with a smile. You’ve long gotten used to Karkat’s voice sounding like he’s forgotten to turn off capslock, and despite his temper he makes for a wonderful friend. “Anything new going on?” The two of you head out, elbows interlinked

“Why do you always go to me for your sordid fucking gossip,” he grumbles. “Remember that lady from that antique shop I work at?” 

“Tall, pale and mysterious? I think I recall.”

“Don’t pretend you weren’t ogling her, you know exactly who I’m talking about.”

You hum thoughtfully though it’s probably not enough to cover my flush. “No I er- um do continue.” 

“So this bitch marches up to me and demands to see you. Doesn’t ask, doesn’t offer to come back later, she just straight up walks up to me like it’s her fucking right to know everything about your godamn life story.” 

“Did you tell her what time I usually show up?” You hate yourself a little bit for asking but it’s not like you can help it.

You swear you spy just the slightest uptick of amusement on his lips before he manages to twist it into a begrudged frown. “Fuck no I didn’t. You can handle your own lesbian drama without dragging me into that bullshit.”

The trick to dealing with Karkat is to never give him credit for things. If you were to point out his adorable attempt at wingmanning he’d get all huffy and go on the defensive about assumptions and such. That being said, you show your silent gratitude by dropping the subject and instead ask about his latest screenplay. 

###  **Kanaya: Attend school.**

You show up at school just in time to keep up with your perfect attendance record. AG is nowhere to be found as usual, but TG is in your homeroom class, which is as good a trade off as any. You and Karkat seat yourself towards the back, and ROXY LALONDE slips into a seat nearby. 

“What’s good lmao?” He asks, his grin already slip sliding a little. “Didya read my update?”

Between your solid stature and Karkat’s endearing chubbiness, Roxy is the tallest of you. He’s mostly limb, with a gait that resembles a bottle about to spill. He habitually wears clothes that are eye catching- today bringing a shitty jacket embroidered with cats and a striped shirt tucked into suit pants. Even with his appearance leaving something to desire Roxy has an impressive array of intelligence. He simply acts like an idiot, which pisses you off at your very best. 

“I have, of course. You know I’m the first to leave a comment when you post.”

“Hell ya babes!” Roxy lifts an enthusiastic fist. You don’t leave him hanging.

“But I’d look over it anyway, as it reads like you’ve been writing under the influence.” 

Karkat snorts, forcibly shouldering himself into the conversation. “How many fucking times do I have to tell you dick stuffing shitter to not get wasted every night? And yet, I continue to be perpetually disappointed by the bullfuckery you pull. Do you need a babysitter? Is that it? Kanaya do you need to look after this chucklefuck?” 

“I do not intend to babysit, nor lecture,” you say cooly. “I however aim to point to the fact that your habits are starting to increase to a dangerous level. One might suggest refurbishing the word habit to mean addiction.” 

“Boo on you guys,” Roxy pouts. “Thx for the concerns and all but I already got that from Janey. She’s really ridin my dick over this.”   
You and Karkat share a look, you trying to signal him to back down and him letting loose a huff before following in compliance. Having friends sure is complicated, especially when you have to sit back and watch them wreck their lives right in front of you. 

Roxy doubles down. “Seriously, have some faith! Maybe I can show you the fun shit you’re missing out on.” 

Your brow wrinkles in instinctual skepticism. “Fun shit.”

“Yeah! It’s not all booze babe- I like to fuck around downtown and see what’s new- night time is off the shits when you know where to look.”

Before you can answer Karkat answers for the two of you, “FUCK no! Some of us actually give a shit about doing things that’ll benefit us in the future, unlike you and your, your-”

“Sin den?” Roxy supplies with a shit eating grin.

You say “It’s just not our scene,” with the intention of placating the two before anything breaks out. 

Right then, the teacher who’s been content with letting the class talk amongst themselves, perks to attention, as do you. Some part of you hopes this ENTIRELY PREDICTABLE ENCOUNTER can provide enough distraction for your friends. 

VRISKA SERKET stumbles into the room, really, stumbles like she’s been running a marathon or more likely, playing up the drama. You notice she’s in her pjs, her unsized cami making it very apparent she isn’t wearing a bra. 

“Hey teach,” Vriska says with a braced grin. 

The teacher glares, and gestures to the class. “If you don’t mind extending basic courtesy, I must ask you to take a seat.” The threat to send her to detention is implicit, though that’s never stopped Vriska before. 

“No doubt, no doubt. You love me though.”   
“Miss Serket please stop acting like we’re friends.” 

Surprisingly enough Vriska aquieses and as she heads to a seat, she moves with a fixed purpose- strutting towards you. Her hair is dual colored today, her natural dirty blond competing against blue. Blue is a common motif with her, starting with the churning waters of her eyes, and stopping with her taped over doc martens. She is too cool to acknowledge you, until she does. You wonder what she needs this time. 

Vriska sits right behind you. “Heyyyyyyyy Kanaya.”

You sigh. “Look, there is no reason for you to go through your dramatics. I will pay my part of the rent on time. I'm just waiting on my paycheck this friday.” 

“What? No, I’m not asking about that! Why can’t I invite a friend to go bar hopping with my other friends?”

You turn to face her, hoping your expression represents an adequate amount of disbelief. “You actually want to socialize with me. If there’s any ulterior motive you might as well say so now-”

Vriska playfully, though her version of playful is up for debate, swats the back of your head. “I just wanna get to know you better! Is that a fucking crime?”

None Vriska said could feasibly be construed as suggestive, yet you find yourself warmed at the cheeks. After months of rooming with her, and now she wants your attention? After months of you silently diverting your eyes when she walks around the apartment in pjs, when you have to endure her long arduous masturbation sessions without saying anything, now she deems you worthy of friendship? Come on Kanaya, you’re better than this. You’re curious enough though, let’s not lie, but that doesn’t mean you have to make things easy.

“I’ll only go if Roxy and Karkat come along.” Karkat sputters and Roxy raises his eyebrows meaningfully, trying to meet your gaze to express his discomfort. You artfully dodge everyone’s reactions, especially Vriska’s moment of surprise before she gathers herself. 

“Why not! Meet me at the bar on SOUND STREET after school.”

###  **Kanaya: Irreparably fuck up your life.**

“I cannot believe you blew me off for Vriska Serket of all people.” Roxy isn’t easily quieted, even as you assist with lacing his corset. 

Karkat, from his place on Roxy’s vanity,says “Are we surprised though? Kanaya, we both know that Vriska is the bottom of the barrel when it comes to girlfriends right? You do know you don’t have to fucking settle for the crustiest of our school’s ass lickers. Vriska fucking Serket is good for one thing and one thing only- fucking so fucking gloriously all the time that it’s become entertainment! Truly, if my shriveled up blackened heart could muster something resembling sympathy towards her I would’ve died of secondhand embarrassment long a fucking go!” 

“The both of you best shut up. I mean, all you’re doing is proving my point. It is only practical that we keep an eye on Vriska.” You earn a squeal from Roxy before remembering to loosen his corset. Your dignity is slipping. “She’s not my girlfriend.” 

Roxy wheezes. “Methinks da lady doth protest too much. Y’all are just a couple of gal pals who live together, stare at each other longingly, look after each other…” 

“Constantly moon after each other like the least romantic pair of morons to exist,” Karkat continues dryly. 

Har har har. You let them have their laughs and graciously do not bring up Dirk or Terezi. 

Once the three of you are prepared to leave, Vriska calls you. 

“Kanayaaaaaaaa where the fuck are you! We’ve been waiting for like fifteen minutes already.”

You respond, ”We’re on our way,” in the most patient tone you can muster. Roxy makes a crude gesture while saying, “needy lol,” which makes you stumble to hang up. 

True to form, the bus is quick to drop you off, where you can hear Vriska’s crowing from inside the bar. It’s rather dingy, the open sign completely out, and the sign labeling the place as “HOMESTEAD BREWERY” is almost too faded to make out at a late hour such as this. Still, it’s the best anyone can hope for from the city. 

The inside proves this. The insulation works quite amongst the winter weather, and the intimately dimmed lighting is effective in covering most of the scruffier spots one would usually pick up on. Vriska, TEREZI PYROPE and ERIDAN DO WE ACTUALLY KNOW HIS LAST NAME are seated in a booth towards the back, with a tray of rolls between them. The streetlights shine through the window Vriska is leaning against, providing a soft halo behind her hair. 

“Fucking finally!” She greets in her usual effusive manner. 

Karkat doesn’t seem to hear her upon spotting Terezi. He stutters in step while you hurry to think up damage control. Terezi doesn’t seem all too bothered, but you know it’s the first time the two have crossed paths since THE DRAMATIC BREAKUP. This is your fault… you should have figured Vriska would bring her dungeons and dragons posse. They’re her only friends after all. 

“Terezi,” Karkat says. 

She grins at him. “Wanna get a drink with me Karkles?” It is not a nice grin, rather the expression of someone examining a mousetrap peeling the poor fucker from the glue. 

You and Roxy join those left and Eridan leans forward on primly folded hands. 

“You do realize none of us can actually buy drinks right?” 

“Why didn’t you let us know! I was depending on you guys to pay,” Roxy says.

“No, I mean we can’t get away with falsies.” 

“Oh in that case.” 

You watch after Roxy and Eridan as they march to the bar, a little curious in your own morbid way. Still, it’s probably best you don’t stress yourself over Roxy’s habits any more than you already do. 

###  **Kanaya: Have a relevant conversation with Vriska. Maybe exposit a little.**

Instead of taking advantage of Vriska’s transparent tactics to corner you with her for a GENUINE CONVERSATION, the two of you end up in the alleyway. YOU, sucking on her tongue with the barest threat of teeth, huffing out rather undignified moans. VRISKA, hiking up your leg and lining herself along your near dripping slit.


	2. Chapter Two

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Kanaya is regretful, but not as much as she should be.

###  **Kanaya: Regret everything**

Your name is KANAYA MARYAM and you have made a GRIEVOUS MISTAKE. It doesn’t feel like that now, but there’s plenty of time to let your regrets sink in. First things first, breakfast.

The weight that was beside you doesn’t mark any deviance in your routine, so it’s easy to act like this is any other morning. Sleeping in the same bed, keeping a chaste distance between each other. Just a pair of roommates with not enough room or money for an extra bed. You ignore the slight slip of cum shaking down your leg. 

As the bacon sizzles you pull out your cell phone and deliberate over calling Karkat. Would it be rude? Vriska’s still asleep and you naren’t dare think of how the confrontation would go if you wake her up. You settle for pestering him and leaving it on vibrate. You snatch a strip of bacon to nibble on as you get dressed for school.

As it turns out you don’t even have to do anything to wake Vriska up. She startles you by wrapping her arms around her waist, nuzzling against your neck. SURPRISE ATTACK IS SUPER EFFECTIVE. YOU DON’T KNOW JACK SHIT ABOUT POKÉMON. 

“No pillow talk?” She asks teasingly. 

You lean back against her, indulging in the contact for a moment as you respond, “Didn’t wanna wake you.” 

“That’s sweet. Okay, so last night was really fun- what d’you think of having regular girl times, just with you and me? We’ve been living together for months now, and it feels like I don’t know anything about you aside from your o face, which is incredibly important, don’t get me wrong.” 

“We could’ve made faster friends if you ever bothered to acknowledge my existence even when it doesn’t benefit you.” You’ve never been one for beating around the bush, and the way her overly familiar presence is only serving to fluster you. 

Silence, with nothing but huffs of warm breath heating up your neck, Vriska seems to deliberate over her answer. Wise move, if just a little insulting that she has to think twice about it. 

“I wouldn’t have fucked you, nevermind invited you to live with me in the first place if I didn’t like you.”   
“That sounds an awful lot like a deflection. Are you telling me you want to be friends or are you defending your honor?” 

Vriska steps away, her lower lip wobbling and narrow eyes resolved. “Don’t project your shit on me Maryam. I’m reaching out and you need to meet me in the middle. Like, I’ve got my own irons in the fire!!!!!!!! We can’t all spare the time for your victim complex, so get over it.” 

She leaves in a huff, not allowing you the time to answer. In terms of addressing Vriska Serket, having one of her patented dramatic stalk outs is one of the best results one can get. 

You give her time to gain distance, relieved that she takes the bus every morning, before heading out. Karkat has returned your texts with his usual enthusiastic shit fits, but you don’t bother responding as you hurry down the apartment stairwell. 

Your hair is braided in twin spirals close against your head, and you’ve fashioned a dress slip under your favorite oversized velvet cardigan, the material swishing as your step suffers in a pair of chunky Mary Janes. Sometimes when you’re dithering in terms of uncertainty, reorganizing tired outfits helps boost your confidence. 

Karkat tilts his head upon seeing you, as if having his entire image of you is rebooting, and needing to be manually updated. It’s every fear you’ve had about losing your virginity wrapped in a disparaging glance. If it wasn’t Karkat you’d be tempted to run back and lock yourself in for the rest of eternity.

He gets straight to business. “Should I list every fuck up you’ve made in chronalogical order?”

You nod numbly, not bothering to look at him, which is why you’re so caught off guard by Karkat wrapping his arms around your waist. If it was anyone else, the weight of his head against your breasts would be awkward but you merely rest your chin upon his messy hair. “You know I’m not actually mad at you right?” Karkat chides. “It’s just so marvelously stupid how you lose all sense around girls who don’t fucking deserve you.” 

“I’m finding it harder and harder to dispute you on this subject,” you sigh out. 

“Why even bother with Vriska in the first place? Dad and I have plenty of room for you to move in.”   
“I simply cannot impose upon your hospitality in that manner. Really, the only reason I accepted Vriska’s offer is because we were in the same boat, and I figured I could contribute to her rent which would make things mutual. For a while things worked out until… last night.” 

The clouds tumble mischievously above the two of you, thunder a threat long ways yet. Karkat’s fuzzy brows deepen the wrinkle betwixt as he listens in his usual concentrated manner. “Well, the offer still stands.” 

“Thank you,” you say warmly. If there’s one thing you will always adore about Karkat, it’s his near contrary earnestness. In younger years he was more than willing to pick fights with everyone. Still is to some extent really, but now he’s not so recitant about hiding the side to him that cares so much. It’s progress that gives you just enough hope to smile even now. Even when you say,

“I’m just not sure how to become less of a doormat,” in a rare fit of self defeatism.

“You can stop thinking with your genitals for a start.” 

###  **Kanaya: Visit the antiques shop**

The antiques shop where Karkat works has a certain whimsy to it. It’s small, the walls painted a dusty rose with things like jewelry and belts hooked along them. The shelves of variously useful clutter create narrow aisles, which is where you find yourself as you and Roxy peruse the place. 

Roxy picks up a ceramic wizard with a raggedy looking beard, chipped paint and the ugliest god damn face to ever grace a wizened old man. “Haha holy shit look at this boy,” he brandishes the figurine at your face despite your displeased expression. His vinyl sweater and broad smile are shiny enough to catch the dusty light in a gaudy display of expense that outdoes even the most polished trinkets. 

“Are you sure you want to waste your money on that thing? It’s overpriced and you know Karkat doesn’t provide discounts.” 

“You fucking with me? Of course I want this lol it’ll fit my aesthetic so well. Besides, Janey says I gotta get a hobby that isn’t ‘self destructive.’” Roxy puts upon a high and vaguely southern accent that makes you glare at him. 

“If you think I’ll be guilt tripped into letting you get that ugly thing,” you say half heartedly but don’t argue further.

Roxy ends up buying the accursed object and you linger around as he banters with Karkat. Today there’s nothing really catching your eye, not until something white catches in the bronze surface of an elaborate shield. You turn with a pointed spin of the heel, not willing to let anyone get the satisfaction of your surprise. 

It’s the TALL PALE AND MYSTERIOUS WOMAN you’d briefly spied the other day, carrying a SHOPPING BAG LADEN WITH BOOKS. Up close she isn’t all that TALL AND MYSTERIOUS, though she certainly is rather pale. 

The woman is about your height, with narrow shoulders defined by her silk purple shirt, it’s buttons strategically undone enough to showcase her cleavage as well. Her pants are leather and hard to miss with your onceover before you catch yourself. You focus on safer areas. The woman has a scarf wrapped securely around her head. Yes, concentrate on her wardrobe.

Her head and everything else about her is rather boney actually, in a dignified way. As if the woman, while delicate enough to break, had decided to go through life as if she were made of the toughest steel. There’s a septum piercing poking out under her broad nose, her lips bloodless yet thick. The woman’s eyes are sunken deep with a daunting black, merely highlighted with what appear to be flecks of purple in the right lighting. This is not a safer line of thought. It’s more like you’re internally describing an elegant vampire Kanaya stop being so desperate I’m begging you.

“Pardon me, I know you don’t work here, but I was hoping to get your help with something anyway.”

You startle out of your thoughts, then jerk your head in Karkat’s direction. “I think you’d have better luck with him.” 

The woman says, “Well, yes but I’d feel rather rude interrupting their conversation. Besides, all I really need is your attention,” as her lips quirk into a self deprecating smile. She produces a book from her bag, offering it to you. 

“The other day I couldn’t help but notice you seemed quite enraptured by a Twilight book, and well, as any avid reader could tell you that’s a damn shame, considering you strike me as far too sophisticated for such vapid literature.” 

You turn the book she handed you over to see a glossy cover with a homoerotic illustration of a vampire curled over a blond woman. The vampire is frail looking, with an almost comically bent spine, which is adorned in a black gown that glitters. The corners of the cover are worn. CARMILLA is titled above it. “So. You saw me and decided to butt into _my_ business just to insult my interests,” You interpret archly. 

The woman has the decency to look sheepish, though not enough to back off.

“Yes. I’ve understood that to be an appropriate icebreaker.”

The absolute _nerve._ You’ve been the butt of plenty of jokes because of your forthrightness but you’ve never met someone with the, with the _gall_ to mock you to your fucking face. 

You say, “There’s such a thing as tact,” in a manner that you’ve never talked to an adult before.

“Of course I know what tact is. I just don’t think it applies to me.” 

“No?” 

“Of course not. Would you rather I talk in circles around you until my intentions are blurred and my interest in you is left to interpretation to turn over and over in your head as you lay in bed, wondering what could’ve been.” 

“Well. If you’re approaching me with such bluntness, what is behind your interest in me?” 

The woman winks as if letting you in on a secret. “I think I’ll be tactful and leave it for interpretation.” 

Snarky broad.

“I think you really ought to ask that ‘young man’ for help after all.” After gesturing to Karkat once more, you pretend something else has grabbed your attention, making it very clear she’s to leave you alone. She respects your unspoken dismissal, slipping up the stairs that lead to the apartment above, where Ms Jade lives. 

Karkat doesn’t seem to have noticed the woman at all. Conversely, Roxy nudges your shoulder, asking about the woman with a slight frown. You shrug him off. 

“It was just some weird old lady negging me I think,” you explain. 

He wiggles his brows. “Dude, you should’ve gone for it. Everyone knows cougars do it better.”

“I mean I wouldn’t word it like _that_.” 

“Neither of you should be allowed near women,” Karkat says disgruntled. 

###  **Kanaya: Actually confront Vriska**

On your way home, you text Terezi, a relatively unused contact. She confirms your suspicions- Vriska’s sleeping over which frees you this evening. You spend the night curled up on the mattress, watching your favorite show HANNIBAL THE CANNIBAL and wishing you had the motivation to do something important. You wrap your blankets closer around your body as you open up the OBSOLETE SITE otherwise known as FACEBOOK. Despite the vow you’ve made for yourself, you end right back here like a saved end point. 

PORRIM MARYAM’S profile consists of snapshots of her current life. A group selfie at a wine tasting, pictures of her new labradoodle, sneaky shots of her scummy looking boyfriend even. 

You don’t generally make it a habit to hate stalk people on the internet, but there’s something to be said for the fact that all of this information is gleaned from depressive Facebook stalking, instead of Porrim bothering to text you. When her account loads up, you’re expecting the same day to day records. 

Instead, the first post to forcibly hit your vision is a picture of Porrim, standing next to her boyfriend with a sign between the two. Her smile is more radiant than you’ve ever seen, and her boyfriend has a fond hand settled on her hip. The sign reads:

EVERYONE WELCOME THE UP AND COMING ADDITION TO OUR FAMILY ARRIVING IN AUGUST :) 

with a little plane underside. 

You’ve never been more incensed, and immediately decide to throw your vow aside. The keyboards clack as you enter the PREVIOUSLY UNEXPLORED TERRITORY that is Porrim’s FACEBOOK MESSENGER.


	3. Mini Intermission

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kanaya: Have a heartwarming reunion that will definitely not become plot relevant later.

**GA: I Do Hope You Know What You Are Doing**

**Porrim: What the fuck do+es that mean?**

**GA: Well Let Us Examine The Current Situation You Spent Years Butting Heads With Mother Over Your False Activism And Fabricated Oztraziation Only To End Up Just Like Her Did You Just Use Mother’S Expectations As A Method To Rebel**

**Porrim: I’m no+t at all like that wo+man and yo+u kno+w it. Just because i'm having a baby do+esnt mean im in anyway what mo+ther wanted fro+m us. She wanted us to+ be breeding machines. I'm do+ing what I want fo+r o+nce.**

**GA: Is This Truly What You Want Dating A Greasy Looking Man And Having His Child Living With The Knowledge That Mother Will Never See The Path You Have Taken**

**Porrim: Fuck yo+u. Fuck yo+u. It’s no+t like yo+u’d understand. Yo+u'll never meet a nice girl who+ might kno+ck yo+u up o+r anything, so+ it’s no+t like mo+m wo+uld care abo+ut that.**

**Porrim: ……I’m so+rry. That was to+o+ far.**

**GA: I Am Not Sorry But I Do Apologize If It Will Be Enough To Placate You**

**Porrim: Hah. What have yo+u been up to+?**

**GA: Oh So Now You Show Interest In My Life**

**Porrim: …**

**GA: Yes That Was Rather Petty On My Part I Actually Have Met A Nice Girl Vriska- I Believe You Know Her Sister**

**Porrim: I kno+w eno+ugh abo+ut aranea to+ kno+w there’s no+ way that brat can be a nice girl.**

****GA: She Really Is Though I Mean One Might Not Regard Vriska As Nice Persay But She Has Her Merits She Has Remarkable Patience And Has Never Shown Any Entitlement To My Feelings Though I Will Asmit, It Is Hard To Find Her Angle.** **

****

****

**Porrim: Angle?**

**GA: Yes Vriska Never Does Anything For Free And The Dept I Owe To Her For Housing Me Coupled With… Last Night I Just Know She Is Waiting For Something In Exchange**

**Porrim: She a go+o+d lay?**

**GA: What**

**Porrim: Yo+u mentio+ned so+mething abo+ut last night so+ i'm assuming yo+u guys fucked.**

**GA: I-**

**Porrim: O+r do+ yo+u call it “making lo+ve?”**

**GA: I Think I Ought To Head To Bed**

**Porrim: Hahaha. Serio+usly tho+ugh. I'm so+rry fo+r no+t co+ntacting yo+u.**

**GA: Of Course Why Should I Wait For Anyone To Initiate Anything**


	4. Chapter Four

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This is rather short, but every chapter of this fic is necessary.

###  **Kanaya: Visit Ms Jade**

Every Saturday, you, ROXY and KARKAT head to the upstairs area of the ANTIQUES SHOP. It resembles a finished attic, where the only thing separating a SMALL BATHROOM is a BEADED CURTAIN. A HANDSOME WARDROBE takes up the right wall, where TEXTBOOKS are stacked atop, and a BASS leans against its double doors. Thrown to the side is a GUN and a BONG, as if recently abandoned, and taking up most of the SPACE in this room is a MODEST BED, with an INTRICATELY CARVED headboard. 

Residing in this bed is a PRONE FIGURE, mostly hair showing as it’s splayed across the pillow, black and jettisoned with grey. JADE HARLEY herself. Finding Ms Jade asleep is such a regular event that you’re no longer embarrassed when Karkat stalks forward and yanks at her quilt. 

She leans forward to try wrapping herself up again. “I’m up asshole, it's just cold in here,” Jade slurs in a muzzy voice. 

“Well you can get a sweater or something.” Karkat deftly folds the quilt and places it on the foot of the bed. She stands and greets you and Roxy with a wan smile. Lately you find that Jade seems to smile less and less often, but when she does you find great enjoyment in spying the crows feet indentations that show. Jade looks rather cold in a bata that covers her shins, but not her arms or feet. As she rummages through her wardrobe for one of her many shawls she makes small talk. 

“How have all of you been? Aren’t there final exams to study for?” 

Roxy leans against the wardrobe. “Don’t worry Ms, we’re all studious here. It’s just been such a difficult time lately.” He pulls an exaggerated pout that tells everything. Jade rolls her eyes but continues in good humor. 

“Schools these days put too much emphasis on grades and all that. Not to sound old, but ‘back in my day’ the best teacher was nature and my natural curiosity. Maybe in college you’ll discover the same thing.” Her days of natural education and island maintenance have evidently served her well. Muscles still tone her arms, any remaining fat has shed throughout the years, and her skin retains a healthy tan. 

“Of course,” you say diplomatically, counting on Roxy shut the fuck up. Thankfully, while he has rather loose lips around adults, he keeps a respectful presence around Jade. 

Jade bundles herself in a brown shawl with tassels and slips her feet into a pair of boots. “All ready to go,” She announces, signaling the others to follow her downstairs. 

###  **Kanaya: Interrogate Ms Jade**

The DOWNTOWN AREA is usually crowded on the weekends, and while you aren’t exactly in favor of that sort of thing, this happens to be exactly what Jade needs. You’ll never admit it but you've noticed how easy it is for Jade to shrink in on herself, barricading herself in her room as opposed to facing the overwhelming atmosphere of the city. Nowadays Jade is doing better, though Karkat makes it a point to visit and make sure she gets some fresh air. 

The snow is falling fast, and the ice makes your steps slick, so you stop at a COMBINATION BOOKSHOP and CAFE. Through the window you can already feel the warmth, the MELLOW lighting and PLUSH armchairs beckoning. Karkat says something that’s lost in the wind but it’s always a safe assumption he’s been meaning to take a look around there as he is always prone to. Roxy hurries to the cute little FIREPLACE to warm his hands, and Karkat joins to take a seat with a relieved sigh. 

Jade leaves a gentle three fingers on your elbow. “Hot cocoa?” she offers, to which you nod eagerly. It’s always nice to be at Jade’s attention, especially lately. You order a mocha coffee flavored hot chocolate Jade gets chai tea. 

As you peruse the vampire romance section, you set to asking Jade about that MYSTERIOUS LADY that visited her yesterday. 

Her brow arches. “Mysterious lady?”

“With all due respect Ms Jade,” You answer pleasantly, “Don’t bullshit me.” 

“Ha! That was just Rose. Truth be told she doesn’t come over often, but when she does I always insist she visits me first.” Jade slides you a coquettish expression. “You know, she demanded to know everything about you the second she arrived.”

You HUMBLY IGNORE that.

“Where’s she visiting from?”

“Oh here and there. I know she has a fancy penthouse in New York but she never really touches base there. Sometimes I wonder how lonely she must be, from never settling down.” 

“Yes I’m sure being rich and being able to travel everywhere must be a terrible burden,” you mutter into your mocha.

“Really Kanaya, be fair. Rose was raised from an isolated childhood, so even now I imagine that’s had an effect on her psyche.” 

“Sure, whatever- wait, Rose?” 

Jade eyes you over her cup. “I’d assumed you at least knew her name? If I’m not mistaken you are a fan of her work,” she says, with an unspoken question underlined. 

“Rose… as in ROSE LALONDE?”   
“I… You didn’t even bother asking her name?” 

“I figured she was just some weird relative of yours or something.” You pretend to be drawn towards a vampire manga series. Truth be told, it is incredibly embarrassing when you take into account Rose’s unique features and lofty attitude somehow going over your head. This doesn’t change your annoyance of her as a person however. You can tell Jade is staring down the back of your head, and sneer in the hopes of escaping her notice.

Jade chides you anyway. “You should get to know Rose before judging her.”

“I- how? Would she still want to meet with me after I was so rude?” 

You play with your sleeve bashfully recalling the conversation that took place with you and. And your idol. 

“You know Kanaya,” Jade declared, totally unfamiliar with your Vriska and Porrim troubles, “people aren’t as unforgiving as you think.” 


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Uuuh so this is just smut dude. Look at end notes for a plot summary if you wanna skip.

###  **Kanaya: Have some long sought out alone time.**

You open the apartment door to immediately spy VRISKA SERKET. She’s lounging on the couch in a decidedly UNSEXY MANNER, the slight swell of chest prodding against a wife beater as she snacks on popcorn. A TRUE CRIME DOCUMENTARY is playing on the screen, and you circle her for a hesitant second. Without glancing toward you, Vriska grouches,

“Well? Are you just gonna hover?” 

You move to sit by her and look her in the eye. “I’ve made a decision.”

She oogles you, chapped blue lips spread open slightly. “Well?” She repeats. 

You shuffle closer, and reach a hand out to stroke her jaw. When it comes to two HORMONAL TEENAGERS, these sorts of things don’t get any proper lead up or foreplay. Only Vriska and you being close enough to mingle fluttering breaths.

There’s no telling who kisses who, but Vriska makes sure to crawl on top right away, bracketing your hips with her bony legs. Her tongue flickers against your lips, which immediately give way. Teeth clack with initial awkwardness. You’re quick to adjust, tilting your head and breathing quick through flared nostrils. You paw at her neck to feel her pulse. It matches with yours, the apprehension evident. 

Vriska pulls you flush, and you follow along, steadying your grip on her waist, inching downwards. Something about this feels like deja vu, remnant enough for her to trace your neck and collarbones the way you like, a new enough experience for you to still gasp in surprise. As if of their own accord your hips rock forward, and she takes this as a cue to shove her leg in between. Your pelvis jerks upwards as the two of you find a pace. Vriska’s already panting, her heavy breaths tickling skin. Heat builds in your groin, just barely assuaged by the pressure of her knee.

“Hah,” Vriska laughs breathlessly. Whatever she might’ve said is replaced with a moan when you palm her twitching bulge. You’re very careful with the way you brush along the length, reveling in every twitch and arch this earns you. In return she sneaks a hand under your dress, frustratingly bypassing between your legs and stopping to ghost along your bra. Your heart stops as she works a hand under to tease at your nipple, teasing the flesh until it's peaked and you can't stand the way your clit seems to throb.

Eventually you really can't stand it, throwing your dress overhead, and tugging your bra off. It isn’t all too much of a SEXY STRIP DOWN, but Vriska seems appreciative enough and it does the job. You push her down the side of the couch until you’re straddling her torso. 

“I can’t get it up,” Vriska says. 

You glare down at her. “Wow, you really know how to talk up a girl.”

“No uhm, I mean literally. HRT.” 

She grins sheepishly as your eyebrows shoot upwards. 

Oh.

“Oh. Oh! I mean congrats uhm.” You fidget in place before steeling yourself to peel off your underwear anyway. Plain red boxers, not exactly sensual. “I guess you can eat me out then,” You say, shooting for confidence, although your voice cracks slightly. Vriska goes along with it, urging your legs to move you closer to her face. 

She starts by kissing your thighs,leading up to your hip, and taking a moment to bite and suck. You tremble and inhale sharply, but keep it together. Vriska noses along the bush of pubic hair you’re embarrassed about. She kisses your pussy lips like she kissed you, and leans back slightly to lick the wetness coating her lips. You shudder. She pecks your clit, and spreads your pussy lips open, gently licking along your labia, until she finds your entrance. The first probe with the tip of Vriska’s tongue has your hips bucking. Sharp laughter tickles and hands tighten around your thighs.

When the now familiar white spots invade your vision you nearly collapse on her face. You're enough of a ragdoll to let Vriska set you down to the right of her, as she palms at her boxers. You passively observe this before reaching a hand forward to ghost along her nipples, stroking her abdomen as it seizes and relaxes in tandem. Vriska’s voice chokes, before she swallows, heavy, and starts up again. Her hand is still working furiously.

“This is a pity fuck isn’t it?” Vriska is surprisingly earnest when she asks and you frown, post orgasm bliss already ripping like wet paper. 

You respond, “what makes you say that?” As if you don’t already know. 

“I can tell when you don’t wanna deliver bad news Kanaya.” Her glare is only slightly softened. “I know you don’t like it but people  _ know  _ you.”

“I- this isn’t out of pity, I am legitimately attracted to you- probably too much so for my own good.”

“But-”

“But you just don’t want anything to do with me unless it’s for a favor or, apparently sex! How am I supposed to take that?”

“And you’re any better how?”

You want to refute her. You bite yout lip and think of every stupid thing you’ve done for Vriska. Her prom dress when she went with Tavros. Putting her back together after Terezi left, and helping her earn forgiveness. These memories come to mind, and others gain context. When Vriska let you live with her. When she gave you space to think things out, to avoid her.  _ Are  _ you any better?

Your brow furrows, and you lean forward, effectively providing a distraction. 

Between your small size and her skinny lankiness, the two of you manage to lie on the couch afterwards. She curls around, like a shadow engulfing the moon. You snuggle close, dropping a kiss between her breasts with a shy smile. 

Vriska asks, almost heartbreakingly hopeful, “Have you considered?” 

“Huh?” you shift to make eye contact.

“I say we try this whole dating thing.” Her grin is crooked and cocky, as if she’d taken the best aphrodisiac.

You thread fingers through her hair,saying nothing else. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Kanaya and Vriska bang, Vriska wants to date and Kanaya sort of agrees.

**Author's Note:**

> Imma just... blatantly plug my discord server here....  
> https://discord.gg/AeVpVvmwDQ


End file.
